Treats
Thais love their food spicy, fried, and/or very sweet! Bland and meek have no place here, and vegetarians will learn to shout "NO MEAT!" when a hand is hovering over the chicken. Tofu is also available, but the carnivorous amongst us will be loving life in Bangkok.
Street food will invariably beat restaurant food on taste, price, and authenticity. Meat on a stick beats meat on a plate, hands down! Head to Khao San Road around 3pm to hit the majority of street food stalls offering various dishes for 30-60 baht, and then pick an alleyway the the connecting warren of streets surrounding it to get more adventurous tastes.
Busses are so much better than in the UK! Bangkok to Koh Chang costs under £10 to travel 350km in 8 hours on a fully air conditioned bus with full recliner seats, free wifi, lunch stop, and more leg room than I knew what to do with! Bloody lush for a mega bus.
Most temples charge a small entrance fee, but you are free to explore til your heart's content and there are next to no restrictions on where you go. This was especially liberating for me, coming from a background of National Trust barriers and red ropes!
Bangkok is a great place to wander around after dark, and feels safe to do so as a woman alone. Of course, you're not invincible so keep your senses about you, but it's certainly comfortable to go to the night markets and mooch around the street stalls in the evening.
Large beers are 600ml here and usually cost 80-100 baht. That's over half a litre for £2. YES PLEASE.
Compared to other capital cities such as London or Paris, Bangkok has a much lower street population density. This was weird to get used to, but nice not to be a salmon 24/7 as I am in London!
Traps
Research whether you need a visa or not and make sure you know before you arrive in Bangkok! If you're unsure the airport officials will automatically direct you to pay your $30 even if you didn't need to. Stick to your guns and walk straight through to immigration if you're from the UK - I doubted my own knowledge and ended up doing laps!
Tuk Tuks are great for a novelty ride, but for regular use always grab a taxi and ask them to go on the meter. If they refuse, just ask the next one - I've never had to go through more than 3 to get one on the meter, even late at night, and there will always be a long line coming! Also they're bright pink, so you can't miss them...!
Pavements are just another road for motorbikes, so be careful and look all around you at crossings! I mean, these are pretty much guess work anyway (best to wait for some locals to come join you and then follow their lead - safety in numbers and all) but even more so when the motorbikes can go the wrong way around roundabouts, up streets, and generally anywhere! Good fun to watch when you're used to it.
Don't forget to barter! Pretty much all prices are up for negotiation in Bangkok, especially if you're buying multiple items from the same person. Always go with a smile, and only start bargaining if you actually intend to buy the item. Best bet is to ask at several places what their starting price is, and then get an idea of what the going rate is by knocking off a quarter. Generally ask price, offer 50-60% of that price, and then settle around 65-75%. If they accept your first price, you've gone too high so learn for next time! Successful discounts require a certain amount of charm, experience and luck.
Common tourist scams include the old "it's a Buddhist holiday, the palace is closed... Why don't you do a tour of XYZ instead? I can drive you all day!" This one burned quite a lot of people I met in my hostels in Bangkok and is rarely ever true! Stick to your guns and go to the places you want to go to - if there really is a holiday, there are lots of museums and sites of other religions to visit for a day.
Be careful buying moisturiser in Bangkok - most products have skin whitening agents in them, which is not ideal when trying to preserve/induce a tan!
Tips
I wouldn't bother with a Thai SIM card if you're not planning to have phone calls regularly, as the 3G internet can easily be replaced with free wifi. Bangkok has better wifi connection than I've had in London, and good quality wifi seems to be a standard in most hostels too! Of course, if you are a screen addict or live tweeter then it is still not an expensive habit at all.
If walking barefoot freaks you out, wear slip off trainers with pop socks. You'll need to take your shoes off for all temples, but at least you'll have some barrier. This is also good in the high heats as marble and wood can get incredibly hot in the midday sun!
Always book your hostel for the first night in advance, but beyond that do it on the fly. Wander around the area you want to be - hostels tend to always have beds going and if they don't then one of the 7 next door will! Always see the dorm and bathrooms before you check in, and only book one night at a time. You can always extend your stay, but it's such a nightmare to be booked in to a place you don't like.
All tours are organised with stickers which are colour coded depending on your tour package. If stickers freak you out, bring a notepad or something to stick them onto rather than yourself.
Be observant. 200 baht for an hour's massage is good going, but if the parlour has ping pong in the title you might well be getting more bang to your buck than you were expecting... If that's what you're into, though, head to Pattaya ASAP for some truly Hangover inspired nights.
Bangkok is hot. Really hot. And humid and sticky and wow. Females wanting to visit temples but also not expire: best bet is to wear shorts and a 3/4 length t-shirt (absolutely no shoulders) and bring a sarong to wrap around your waist before heading into the temples. Keeps you cool as well as being respectful - winner winner. Just make sure your sarong wraps around a couple of times - a cheeky thigh flash every other step kind of defeats the whole modesty aim.
If you're a fitness bean and can't go a day without a run, Bangkok offers a limited window: dawn. It's pretty much the only time it'll be cool (relatively), the streets pretty much empty, and the air is less than 70% exhaust. That being said, a run at dawn is an amazing experience as you'll see all the fresh fruit and veg stalls and a more Thai Bangkok than when all the tourists roll out of bed!
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